We sat down with the ever-stylish, endlessly impressive, and downright adorable Amber Whittington. If you don’t already know her (where have you been?!), she’s the face behind the iconic @AmbersCloset – a must-follow YouTube channel that’s been making waves in the LGBTQ+ community for years.
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Amber started Amber’s Closet as a passion project, creating a safe haven for queer voices, and it’s grown into the go-to space for empowering, relatable, and inspiring content. Whether she’s serving fashion realness or dropping wisdom on important issues, Amber is a force to be reckoned with.
When we hit up The Dinah this past September, catching up with Amber was a no-brainer. In our chat, we covered everything from her killer fashion tips to her thoughts on the current political landscape. Trust us, you don’t want to miss this one. Dive into the full interview and get ready to feel all kinds of inspired.
Watch the Interview with Amber Whittington
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Thanks to the crew behind this interview:
Interviewer – Zoie O’Brien
Videography – Felicity West
Director & Production – Abi Martin-Hill
Read the Interview with Amber Whittington
The below is the transcript from the above interview, some of the questions and answers have been cut down for clarity.
Zoie
Thank you so much for being here with us. [There’s] So much to talk about; sports, politics, and activism. But first I want to start with the queers. The queers need help, right? So, you come out, you go through all of that kind of craziness, and then it’s like, how do I dress? *laughs*
Amber
*laughs*
First of all, thank you for having me. And it’s so funny because that’s how I started Amber’s Closet. [It] was me doing videos in the closet and showing fashion, and then later on, I realised, oh gosh, and I’m making videos to help people come out of the closet. It’s a double entendre. It was an accident, but it worked, right? And I think my fashion sense came from like, well, my parents were very fashionable, but I went to Catholic school my whole life. So when I did get to wear normal clothes, which is only on the weekends, I had to be, you know, fly, I had to really come with it. And then, I don’t know, my sister and I just like both were opposite, because she was Ashton’s Closet first. And then, yeah, I don’t know. Just like fashion always became our thing.
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Zoie
Every kind of queer person goes through that thing, especially lately, when there are more kinds of labels to stuff, and you’re like; well, which one am I? I don’t know which one to try. Do I do fem? Do I do stem? What was that transition like for you?
Amber
*laughs*
Okay, so that was the other thing. I think because I was, like, I had just such a balance of feminine [and] masculine, and like, what I wanted to wear wasn’t what people were wearing. And so I kind of was always the tomboy. I kind of was always the androgynous one. And then when I just, like, came out and came into myself, I realised I wasn’t like anybody else. So one night, I was just like, I’m not a stud, I’m not a fem, I’m a stem and I just started saying it, and then that became, like, a part of the thing that I did on the internet. I’m like, Listen, I’m gonna show you how you can dress like this and dress like this. I can have my masculine and feminine qualities. And it’s cool, right? How to put it together. And I think that’s kind of why my videos, like, people started being like, what is this? Because when I would dress like that in the club at first in LA, I’d have my pants sagged, but I’d wear, like a BB top right? and like it’s like, blinging with my hat backwards, the studs wanted to fight me. And then the girls that I was interested in didn’t know what to do with me, right? It kind of like had to grow and people had to, like, come into it and be like, Oh, okay, right. But back then, I felt like labels were necessary for me to be like: This is what I am. I’m different than what there is, and this is [what] I need people to understand. Nowadays, I don’t really think that we need to label ourselves. So I’m not really huge on it, and that’s why, when people are like, what are you I’m like, listen, the internet tells me I’m a stud. Then they tell me I’m not a stud, and then they tell me, I’m this. I’m just, you know, I’m just Amber.
Zoie
Yeah, because that was what I was going to ask you as well. I mean, do you think those labels are helpful? Or do you think they start to become divisive in a way, because everyone’s like, well, I don’t know what that is? Am I that? And like, when someone says, what kind of lesbian are you? I’m like, I don’t know the kind that sleeps with women, like what? I don’t know how to label it. Do you think they’re helpful, or do you think they’re becoming unhelpful?
Amber
I think they’re helpful for certain people, it’s like, where you are in your journey, right? For me, I really needed it at the time, because I really needed to understand who I was. It helped me figure me out and where I would fit within the community and everything. I do understand, you know, I’m one of the people that protect the word stud, right? And I’m trying to give the history on it. And when I do that, people think I’m being divisive, but really, I’m just trying to protect the one thing that the specific black, masculine lesbian community has, right? It’s not about being divisive. It’s just a respect to where the history to our ancestors that literally had it wasn’t easy for them, right? So it’s like just trying to protect but no, I don’t feel anybody’s divisive if they need, you know, a label or any category to feel comfortable or find their space or find their community. I’m all about that.
Zoie
Love that!
So when it comes to feedback that you get online, you were one of the early people to come out and kind of be like, Okay, I can dress like this. I can do both. What’s it been like? I mean, you must have had so many people thanking you for the help, really?
Amber
Yes, it’s so awesome. First of all, I feel blessed all [of] the time to still be relevant. Next month, it’ll be 12 years since I started putting up videos, and I can’t believe I’m still doing it. And people don’t even understand how much it means to me and how much I appreciate when they come up and they make me feel old, right? They’re like, Yo, I was watching you in middle school and everything. And I’m just like, yeah, we grew up together. And that’s kind of what I say to people, and I hug them, and I just really appreciate them sharing what my videos did for them. Because it helps me remember why I’m still going. Because I’ve had, it hasn’t been an easy road, right? And so there’s been so many times where I’ve wanted to quit and not do videos anymore, and so those moments, literally, like, just helped me remember. And then I’m like, yeah, I gotta keep going. So they’re my motivation for sure?
Zoie
Yeah. How do you deal with it? How do you deal with it when it becomes negative when you know when you get feedback that you know you don’t enjoy or kind of feels personal, how do you pick yourself up and move on from that?
Amber
I really don’t care. I think the thing is, it just comes with being on the internet, and sometimes, every once in a while, they’ll hit a little spot and hurt your feelings, but you’re like, wait, I don’t even know these people, right? And they’re like, their job is to be a hater. And I say all the time that, like, you have to remember that hurt people try to hurt people. So those people making those negative comments are just not happy people. And it’s like, I can’t sit here and go back and forth with someone that’s really unhappy. I’m gonna send them well wishes and be like, I hope you have a good day. And that’s just it, right? And so I just try to keep it there. And then with the homophobic people, all those poor babies, first of all, everybody that’s so loud on the internet and being homophobic, they’re the ones struggling with their identity, like the most, right? Because why would you even care about someone else, like what are you? Why would you care about what I’m doing and who I’m sleeping with, unless you’re struggling with it inside, right? I don’t know. That’s how I feel. So then I really feel bad for those people. I’m just like, Oh baby, I hope you can come out one day – be happy too. *laughs*
Zoie
*laughs*
So, when and why did you move from fashion to activism? Because you’re so outspoken on so many different things. How did that shift come about?
Amber
It’s always been me since I was young, I was always Student Council and stuff like that. I was a nerd jock. Like I really was. I did honours, like science and stuff like that. I was in the drama club, you know and then also I was an athlete, right? So I always had the balance. But since I was young, I realised when I saw my first unhoused person, I kept asking my mom questions, and it didn’t sit right with me. Just understanding our government and stuff. I think since I was like, nine or 10, I wanted to be a politician. I’m like, Oh, this is how I don’t allow someone to be on the street. Because I could not stop thinking about this lady. I would ask my mom to take me to the store where she was every week when I got my allowance and I would get food for and I just since then, I always want to be a politician. Now I thought that because I didn’t go the route that I was supposed to after college and go to law school, because when we were younger, all the politicians were lawyers. So then I thought that that future I didn’t really have a chance anymore, and then speaking up on YouTube, it just kind of came naturally, a little bit here and there, and I didn’t realise, but sharing that and having other people pay attention, helped put me in [the] room now where I’m able to still go that path, if I want to, which is crazy. And so it just has always been a part of me, and it’s just, I guess I feel a sense of responsibility as well. If I have a platform to use my voice to inspire other people to know that their voice is important too.
Zoie
Were you nervous when you started out speaking on issues for the LGBT community [and] the black community? Were you nervous about how that would be, or did it just take off and it felt natural?
Amber
I didn’t care, because I, you know what, once I pushed out of the closet, that was the hardest thing. Going to private school, being one of the only kids of colour, I had to overcome a lot of I don’t care what anybody thinks anymore, and so that’s why I think I was able to just share what I felt was necessary. But when I was saying earlier that sometimes I want to quit, it’s because of me speaking up on these platforms, why I was demonetized, why my videos were taken down and why it was a struggle to keep going, because it was a fight for our voices to be like, hey, where [are] me and my demographic or my community are worth being promoted too, or I should be able to still make money by sharing these very important topics, but it was a struggle. I feel like it’s been hard because of the fact that I shared all those things, because I would have probably been like one of the other creators that were able to make millions if I didn’t, but I had to stay true to myself, and what I feel like is important for our community.
Zoie
What was your coming out experience like, with the kind of online attention as well?
Amber
Well, okay, I don’t know, I came out so late. Like, for me, I feel like I was just always, I was already so grown, so I just kind of like, fell into myself, and then I still feel like I grew up. I’m sharing all these videos and stuff, but I’m like, literally just, I’m sharing them because I’m figuring it out at that time. I’m like, I’m learning myself and learning the community and everything I still, felt like, even years in, I was a baby gay, still figuring it out. I mean, I was gay for a long time. I was dating women for a very long time, but on the low you know. *laughs*
Zoie
*laughs*
You’ve come so far. I mean, just seeing you with Stevie Wonder…
Amber
I know…Crazy, I’m still tripping.
Zoie
How do you feel that you’ve gone from, like, making videos in your closet to coming out, to doing the activism, to now being in this position, like, does it blow your mind all the time?
Amber
Yeah, all the time, and sometimes I just don’t even feel like I’m like, I’m not worthy. This year was great, and the last year was crazy. I received an award from the state legislature, and, well, I have a few, but this one was different from our Senate, our state senate in California and everything. And then I was there when they passed rule 33 so now, because I was present and stuff, I’m like, in the history books, which I think is crazy and so stuff like that happens, or, like, I have a mural on our LGBT centre, and like, I’m just like, I don’t know. I for me. I’m just like, wow, this is amazing. Sometimes I just feel like, I don’t, I don’t know, I don’t think I deserve that. That’s really cool. I’m like, I’m just gay, yo, like, and just talking. But it’s awesome.
Zoie
Do you feel like it’s more important to talk about it in America now we know there are more than 400, I think it is, anti-LGBT.
Amber
Yeah, it was 500 plus as of last year.
Zoie
Yeah, it’s crazy. Do you feel like that makes it more important to speak about it in this country [USA]?
Amber
Absolutely. Yeah, it’s just necessary. And I think that the other are the opposing side has been working for a very long time, being very patient and trying to undo a lot of the things that we worked hard for. And if we don’t start to really pay attention and vote down the ballot, and that means pay attention to our local representation who is in charge of what our kids are learning, and food for the children, just all the basic things, then we’re gonna lose, we’re gonna take major steps back and lose all the rights that we fought so hard for. So yeah, it’s extremely important for us to pay attention to what’s happening so that we have those protections for ourselves and our kids.
Zoie
*nods head in agreement*
Moving forward, want to talk a little bit about sports. First of all, you know your basketball, but also you’ve come from an unfairly talented family. Like, how? You have cousins in football, your dad, football, yeah, you’re doing basketball. I mean how?!
Amber
*laughs*
I don’t know, everybody has the athletic gene and they say the Whittingtons just came out [as] extremely amazing athletes, so smart, a lot of things. I guess I’m blessed. My dad’s family is like, yeah, pretty awesome.
Zoie
What was it like playing basketball in America? It’s a bit of a dream thing, like for us when we look from England, you know, tiny little island, and then we look at female sports out here, and it’s incredible.
Amber
Oh yeah, well, I think now, oh my gosh, basketball back then as a woman wasn’t as popular as what it is now I’m so happy because I feel like that’s what we always deserve. Because I felt like, when you go overseas, women’s sports were they’re professional at 16, and then they have the support that I wish that we had here and now, seeing the, you know, the college girls and the WNBA having more notoriety and support. I’m just like, so happy for that, but yeah, it wasn’t like that for us. I was getting called a lesbian just for being good at basketball, like, a very young age when I don’t even know what that was, I’m like, wait, hold on, is that a dis? What’s going on? What does that even mean?
Zoie
What, like at 14/15 [years old]?
Amber
As young as 12
And I think they were using it as an insult, just because I was athletic when on the court, I think a little bit more masculine, you know, it is what it is. So, yeah, they would call me that. But I wish I knew what that was, so then early on, I could be like, Oh yeah, that makes sense, actually, thank you, because I do have a girlfriend on the low. *laughs*
Zoie
*laughs*
Do you still play [basketball] now?
Amber
I loved basketball. Um, for me, sports became a job. Really early on, I had a scholarship for high school. I went to one of the private schools, and they recruited me for basketball and track. I was really good at that, and then I played soccer outside. So sophomore year, they were like, you have to pick a sport. You’re going to college. For one of them, what is it going to be? So it became a job pretty early, and I think that it burnt out my love early, I went to d1 my first year, and the coach was so bad to me, yeah. So really the love burnt out, and then it became a job. And so really, I only pursued professional after college, just because I had Michael Cooper, which was the head coach of the LA Sparks at the time, come to my game and hand me his card. So I’m like, who’s gonna say no to that? Right? So then I pursued it for a little while after that, but I think, you know, I love basketball, and now I’m just a supporter, you know, but I play sometimes at the gym when the guys talk mess, and I have to just show them up. You know. *laugh*
Zoie
*laugh*
You’ve been successful at basically everything you’ve touched, right? You are thinking of a career in politics, right? You’re moving in that direction, yeah. Is that something that really excites you? What do you think the future holds for you?
Amber
I can’t, you know, it’s really hard. I have this conversation all the time, and I keep telling people, let’s see what happens in November, to see what the future looks like, right? I’ve always wanted to be a politician, and I think once I started realising that me speaking out of my platforms was putting me in the rooms and giving me the chances. I am on several boards right now. I’m a Commissioner in West Hollywood, and so I’m able to now do the work in the rooms, and that’s what makes me happy. So I get to do more than being loud and trying to educate people online. I get to actually do the work, which is awesome. And so from those rooms, I feel like I’m getting support from people saying, hey, I want to help you when you know, and especially me working with politicians, I help with their social media and things like that. But I don’t know, we’ll see. I mean, I would love to be Congresswoman Whittington. I’m not gonna lie. I would love it absolutely if I feel like I can, if there’s a chance to make a difference. I look at our system, and I look at some politicians that are supposed to be representative of certain communities that don’t understand the communities they’re supposed to represent, and I get frustrated. So I feel like we have to, we have a whole undoing, and we need to reinvent almost like or just not reinvent, but yeah, actually, yeah, we just need a lot of position changes. And we need a lot of different voices from the actual communities in a lot of the political positions, we just, we need to undo everybody. Everybody needs to lose their job, okay? *laughs*
We need some new, fresh faces, some new fresh minds and hearts. That’s the thing. I think we [have] completely lost that. America went from loving our families and middle-class America, let’s feed them, whatever, to like we’re corporate America, and that’s really what it is. And I think we lost our humanity. So I’m hoping that in the future we can get back to that.
Zoie
I would love to see it.
I love to see all of your messaging. I also love to see you have fun when I watch on Instagram and your friends look like you have the best time with them. Do you really have that much fun?
Amber
Oh, I think I’m fun. Okay, I like to have fun. I’m kind of like, the peer pressure. I’m not gonna lie, right? I am the one bringing a tray of shots every 20 minutes, but I’m also the Virgo, you know, saying Dama, it’s a dad, Mama, right? That will make you eat and make sure you drink and make sure you don’t get hung over and make sure get home safe. So, yeah, I’m the turnip. I like to be the turnip queen, and that’s the other thing. I can’t run for a political position until it’s okay for me to do that and still have parties. I think of our parties as freedom, and I think they’re very important to have our safe spaces, even if it’s just dancing and grinding on each other. So I need people to understand that. You know what I mean? Can I get a gay-men to that?! *laughs*
Zoie
gay-me *laughs*
The people around you, you know, you always show each other so much support. You’re always bigging each other up all the time. What would your message be to young queer people about, you know, being themselves, picking people up, telling people who [are] around them are also being themselves…
Amber
Yes, authenticity and being around that is, like, so important. And I think one of the only reasons why I feel like I’m still able to go [is] because doing the work is not easy. It’s really hard. And you can get in your mind and like, just, I don’t know, finding yourself is not easy. So having other people like pour in [into you], you gotta be around people that know how to pour into you as you pour into them. And I think that that’s the way that we have the strengthen our community and be able to be ourselves and love ourselves fully and love other people. So yeah, and that’s the humanity I was talking about. I think we just need [to] love one another more.
Zoie
And finally, we’re here at The Dinah, you’ve been here before, on the stages, you’re here now. What is so good about this festival? What keeps people coming back year after year after year?
Amber
I mean, it is like the lesbian party. I mean, I’ve been hearing about this before I even knew what lesbians were like. Let’s be honest, this [The Dinah] has been like a staple, the kind of the prototype for all the other lesbian or queer parties all over the country. So I think that’s what it is. Just this is like a landmark that people just keep coming back to. It’s been a couple of years since I’ve been so I’m really excited to, I don’t know, just be around [the] community. That’s the important part as well, is that Mariah has really made it. So, you know, we can all get together in a safe space. We can turn up in the daytime at the pool and have music at night and party. So it’s really awesome.
Zoie
Thank you so much. Really enjoyed the chat.
Amber
Yeah, let’s go turn up.
Abi is the Founding Director of Nonchalant Ltd. She’s previously had a 7-year career in Digital Marketing within the eCommerce and Travel Sector. Aside from running Nonchalant Ltd, she’s a Software Engineer and has worked on large scale projects for some of the biggest tech giants and was recently shortlisted on the Makers, Google Startups, and Computer Weekly ‘Women in Software Powerlist 2020’.
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